The FatTosis Curse
An Discord user named "Micycle Hawk" received a DM from "CUTIES RISE UP AYAYA". Upon opening it he saw an image of an overweight version of the famous StarCraft personality Artosis. You can see a reconstruction of the image here.
This is what the DM to Micycle read:
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YOU HAVE BEEN VISITED BY FATTOSIS
NOW THAT YOU HAVE SEEN HIM, YOU HAVE BEEN CURSED TO HAVE TO PLAY THE STARCRAFT REMASTERED LADDER AND ONLY PLAY AGAINST LAGGING B-RANK PROTOSS AND UNRANKED BARCODES, 5 HOURS A DAY, EVERY DAY, UNTIL THE DAY YOU DIE
TO REMOVE THE CURSE, FOLLOW THESE STEPS:
- FORWARD THIS MESSAGE AND THE IMAGE TO YOUR FAMILY, YOUR FRIENDS, AND YOUR LOCAL SERIAL BUM TICKLER
- GO TO THE MUSHROOM KINGDOM AND FIND BOWSER'S BIG BLACK CASTLE, AND PROCEED TO CROURB? ALL OVER BOWSER
- PROCEED BACK TO YOUR HOUSE AND POST A DICKBIRD ASCII IN ARTOSIS'S CHAT, YOU WILL NOT BE BANNED BY THE PRISON STATE MODS FOR THIS
- STEAL YOUR MOM'S CREDIT CARD, AND GIVE ARTOSIS A $3.33 DONATION WITH A STORY ABOUT MARIO BEING PEGGED BY PRINCESS PEACH, WHICH HE WILL NOT SKIP, AND INSTEAD FURIOUSLY MASTURBATE TO
- GET A-RANK WITH PROTOSS IN STARCRAFT REMASTERED, THEN STREAM SNIPE ARTOSIS
- BUY EXACTLY 173 KUJOU KAREN FIGURES, AND BUILD A SHRINE DEDICATED TO HER WITH THE FIGURES PLACED IN THE SHAPE OF A TERRAN GOLIATH IN THE CENTER OF THE SHRINE
- PRINT THIS MESSAGE AND IMAGE OUT, DOUSE IT IN CANADA DRY GINGER ALE, AND EAT IT
IF YOU FOLLOW THE ABOVE STEPS YOU WILL BE CURED OF THE CURSE
—
It is unknown whether or not Micycle had followed the instructions, as not long after this information was sent to me, a close friend of Micycle notified me that he had been found dead in his home, with a Carbot Zergling plush doll stuffed in his anus. However, the police had ruled the death an intentional suicide.
Written by Nambona890
Content is available under CC BY-SA
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