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Once upon a time, there was a young man named Hector. He was in 10th grade, or his sophomore year of High School. Some of the kids at school liked to make fun of him and call him 'Hector the Molester' because he liked to offer kids candy and watch a lot of Nickelodeon. Truth of the matter was, he was just a nice guy and would never think of committing horrible sexual acts. Even though he liked to get naked while he watched Spongebob Squarepants on his black and white television. ... Anyway, that's not the problematic element of this story.

One day, Hector thought it would be cool to get on Omegle. If all went well, maybe things would develop and he'd make new friends! He took a bunch of pictures of himself, smiling and wearing a backwards hat and sporting a t-shirt of his favorite rock group, Creed. He would upload his pictures to tinypic and link to them in the private Omegle chatrooms. "What could possibly go wrong?", he pondered, using the catchphrase of his favorite video game icon, Bubsy Bobcat.

The first few people Hector talked to on Omegle were just normal folks. They asked him where he was from and what kind of music he liked, and if he enjoyed chocolate chip ice cream. These conversations weren't anything special, but Hector was just happy to talk to people who wouldn't judge him rashly just for being a nice guy to kids.

But that was when things got... really nutty.

The next person wouldn't tell Hector his name, which was O.K. because there shouldn't haven't been any pressure like that. After initial greetings, their conversation turned to football. "I love it when defensive players get big sacks.", the mystery person suggested. Well, okay, then! Clearly, the person on the other end was a big football fan. This was enough for Hector to bond with him, so the mysterious person now seemed comfortable linking to a picture of himself.

As for the picture...

The person on the other end looked... disheveled. He had sunbright orange hair, baggy, bloodshot eyes, and a ghostly white dress shirt with an awkwardly funnel-shaped collar. What was most bizarre about this picture was that the person appeared to be chewing on... something. Who in the world shares a picture of themselves chewing on something?

"What were you eating?", Hector typed into the chat.

Hector's heart skipped a beat when he saw the response. It took a couple minutes, but the response was... horrifying.


Hector paused. His eyes bulged kinda like a hamster that was being choked by a Transformer robot. "... Meatballs?"




"Nut butter balls?"

"You're getting close. ... Real close."

Hector was absolutely, positively out of ideas. His concern had turned into tedium from this yawn-inducing guessing game. "I give up. What is it?"

What happened next was impossible to explain. Suddenly, the screen changed from text chat to video chat, but that wasn't even the worst part: the video was panning and displaying something so stomach-turning that Hector threw-up last night's meat loaf, mashed potatoes, and coca cola dinner.

Covering the mystery person's floor were severed scrotums with violent incisions that must have been caused by razor-sharp blades. A bloody mix of testicular matter and gore littered a room that must've smelled worse than the world's laziest butcher's slaughterhouse.

The Internet sure can be a nutty place.

The end.

YouTube reading

Credited to DaveTheUseless 

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