Jeff The Killer but I wrote it from memory
"Moving sucks" Said Jeff. He didn't like moving because he has no character. "Can it you failure, I need to talk to our new neighbors." Said his mom, who also had no character. His dad doesn't even do anything. Lpu (guess how much character he has), his brother, agrees with Jeff, but this doesn't amount to anything
"Hey, new kid, give us ya god damn lunch money" said some rather convenient bullies to Lpu. Jeff didn't like this, so he proceeded to beat the everloving shit out of them. Said bullies the promptly lie to school officials, and they believe the kids who have presumably been robbing people at knifepoint (oh yeah I forgot they had knives) for some time, and Lpu takes the fall for Jeff and gets arrested.
For some reason, Jeff's mom thinks it's a good idea to go to some random kid's birthday party, despite her son being in jail. For this occasion, Jeff decides to go out dressed in an alcoholic's hoodie and black jeans. Jeff plays cowboys with said kid, and notes how it's rather childish.
Out of fuck knows where, the 3 bullies from earlier jump a fence while riding skateboards (they also have skateboards) like they're fucking Bam Magera and put Jeff at gunpoint. Why they'd risk their good standing with the school after they randomly believe them by doing a skateboard drive-by on someone they just met is unimportant, as Jeff proceeds to lay the fuck-smack on them. Two of them die, and Jeff somehow gets covered in wine and bleach. The last bully proceeds to kamikaze Jeff with a lighter, which somehow causes Jeff to erupt in a firey blaze like he's protesting the Vietnam War.
Jeff wakes up in the hospital with a bunch of medical shit in him. His face bandages are taken off and it's revealed he looks like an albino Freddy Kreuger. Jeff is insane now for some reason, so he finds this rather pleasant. This insanity causes him to FUCKING CUT OFF HIS EYELIDS AND SLICE OPEN HIS JAW because he feels that look suits him. He also kills his parents for no discernible reason and may or may not have killed his brother after telling him he needs rest.
And then a skeleton popped out.
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